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February 26, 2013 at 11:02 am #8831
My boyfriend and I actually had enjoyable pain free sex last night! 😀
We hadn’t even planned on trying last night, but the stars aligned and we were both in the mood and even had some free time together. I decided that I was ready, if a little nervous, to try just tip only (though I figured it would probably just go right in). As I thought, it went completely in with ease. I had already dilated with the #4 for maybe 20 minutes, #5 for a little over an hour, and the #6 for 20 minutes. We started with me on top, and that was a little bit sore, but not by much. I think it might have been because my legs are a little more tense having to hold myself up in that position. We just stayed still like that as I became more comfortable with it. After a little while of just being like that, I decided I wanted to try missionary position with a pillow under my butt. In order to do that, he had to pull out completely, but I knew it would go back in again easily, so I wasn’t worried. Surprisingly, that was completely pain free! I did notice some discomfort with the wrinkles of the condom, but it didn’t hurt.
I know that Dr. Pacik recommends no thrusting the first time, but after having him in comfortably for a little while, I decided that I wanted my boyfriend to try some very gentle thrusting. I’m really good at communicating when he needs to stop or adjust, and he’s extremely good at doing so when I ask him to, so I think that made a huge difference in what we were able to do last night. I trust him completely. If my boyfriend wasn’t as receptive to my physical and verbal cues to ease up or stop, then we would have just left it at that with no thrusting at all for the first attempt. Long story short, by the end, he was able to thrust pretty quickly (enough for him to climax), and it actually felt pretty good to me!
Today is my birthday in the eyes of the law, but technically since I was born on the other side of the world, yesterday was my birthday. So hooray, serendipity! That was quite a lovely birthday present 🙂February 26, 2013 at 11:24 am #11159
Also, I re-compared my boyfriend to the #6 and he’s just a tiny bit smaller than it. It actually took less than a minute to get the #6 in last night, so I’m sure that helped quite a bit!February 26, 2013 at 11:31 am #11160
Oh, one other interesting thing that I noticed last night is that my boyfriend is actually the widest at the middle, and when we were going slow, I could tell when the widest part was just at the entrance of my vagina (where my spasms are the strongest). It actually took a few tries to feel confident enough to get up off him when we were switching from me being on top to missionary. I just felt more resistance at that part of his penis. Party because of that, and because of my fear of him accidentally pulling all the way out and trying to come back in quickly (and missing!), he kept to short, deeper thrusts when we got to that part of things.
I’m sure I’ll have many more thoughts to share as I reflect upon last night’s experience…February 26, 2013 at 1:23 pm #11161Heather34Moderator
Hi Vashalla! Woooooooooooooooooooh! Huge CONGRATS to you and your hubby! This is wonderful news and I’m so, so happy for you! Happy, happy birthday! What a wonderful birthday gift!!!!!February 26, 2013 at 5:38 pm #11162AllieParticipant
Yay!!! CONGRATS!!!! 🙂February 26, 2013 at 9:36 pm #11163NakitalabParticipant
So happy for you Vashalla! What a wonderful birthday you had! And thank you for being specific with the details. It is very helpful to me and I’m sure to others as well. Big congratulations!February 26, 2013 at 11:32 pm #11165
Ooh, I have another thought. One of the things my boyfriend and I have been doing during “playtime”, even before working with Dr. Pacik, is to have him insert the dilator for me. At first, it was me putting it in with his hand on it as well, so that he knew my physical and verbal cues. Over time, I let him have more and more control. That allowed us to build that trust and a system of communication that was probably really important last night, especially for missionary position, where the guy has more control.March 1, 2013 at 8:37 am #11188HSParticipant
Congratulations!! Great News…
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