Not diagnosed, not sure how to proceed

[vho20]

Hi. I haven’t been diagnosed or referred to a specialist, but I

know I have this. I have never been able to use a tampon and have not ever attempted sex. I have only been examined once with a horrible painful pap smear a couple years ago, and have not had an exam since. I discovered this condition a few months ago after internet search. Do you have to be diagnosed to seek treatment, do I have to request an exam? Do I need to see a physical therapist in order to get treated? I don’t know where to find one. I don’t know what to do.

[Jackie Giannelli, FNP-BC]

Hi vho20 – I’m so glad you found us and reached out for help! Yes, it does in fact sound like you have vaginismus. Vaginismus is defined as the involuntary contraction of muscles around the opening of the vagina in women with no abnormalities in the genital organs. The tight muscle contraction makes sexual intercourse or any sexual activity that involves penetration painful or impossible.

There are different severities of vaginismus, so even though you were able to get through that gyn exam, it doesn’t rule out that you don’t have vaginismus. No woman should cry through a gyn exam.

Normally, your women’s health provider will diagnose you and refer you for treatment if he/she is unable to do so. However, you do NOT need to be diagnosed to start treatment. I would start to peruse this forum to get familiar with the condition, how other’s have experienced this, and how to begin a home dilation program. You will quickly realize that you are:
1) NOT alone in this, vaginismus is WAY more common than most realize
2) this is 100% a treatable condition
3) Able to find tons of support on this forum in your vaginismus journey
4) are not abnormal or broken for having this condition

To get started, we definitely recommend the Syracuse medical dilators, and LOTS of lubrication. Please reach out for any questions!

Jackie

[recessivegenequeen]

Hi vho20 – I’m glad you came to the forums. I had vaginismus for about 10 years before getting treatment at the Maze Clinic and it can be really scary and frustrating to experience the symptoms of vaginismus without realizing what’s wrong. I’m glad you’ve found some answers on the internet already.

Jackie had great suggestions here, and the thing I especially want to remind you is that treatment IS possible – this condition isn’t a lifelong trap. Getting help can happen as soon as you’re ready to be treated, and there are a lot of different options that can help depending on what you need and how severe your case is. I recommend getting some dilators and giving them a try. Let us know how things go and if you have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask! So many women have felt how you’ve felt and have made it to the other side.

[Sks823]

Hi vho20,

Just wanted to give my support – it’s likely that you have vaginismus and great that you were able to find out what you have already 🙂

I agree with Jackie and recessivegenequeen that you can browse this forum for tons of advice and success stories from those of us who went through exactly what you’re going through!

Trying dilators on your own, as suggested, would be a great step if you can – with lots of lube and going very slowly and being patient with yourself and your body, it should be easier to use the smallest dilator than to put in a tampon. There are also options like seeing a pelvic floor therapist to have them help you insert the dilators.

With patience and determination, vaginismus is SOOOOOOOOOO treatable and you will be able to overcome this! 🙂

Cheers and keep us updated!

[vho20]

I used the smaller one from intimate rose last night. I have a burning pain this morning. It’s not debilitating, but I am worried something is wrong? Also I don’t know how to relieve it.

[recessivegenequeen]

Hi vho20 – hopefully you’ve figured this out by now, but a burning pain the day after dilating is just your muscles feeling sore from being stretched! If you’ve ever taken up a new kind of exercise before and found your body sore as it gets used to the workouts, your vagina is just experiencing the same thing. The burning feeling will get less intense with time (and now that you know what they are it’ll probably be less worrisome when you have them). As annoying as this pain can be, one thing it’s telling you is that the muscles ARE stretching and getting less clamped, so you are making progress!

How is the dilation going now? Let us know if you have any other questions!

[Sks823]

Hi vho20,

Just popping back in to ask how dilator progress has gone!!

Burning pain after dilating is definitely normal/common so don’t stress about it! 🙂

[Ettina]

I’d just like to say that each time I’m pushing myself to a new stage in my treatment, I’ve experienced the burning pain you described. When I was first starting with the smallest size and each time I’ve gone up a size. It fades after awhile if you keep at it. And acetaminophen can help lessen the ache.