pregnant and survived ultra sound!

[GoldDahlia]

Congratulations, Sofi! I am so happy for you that you had such a successful pregnancy and delivery after overcoming vaginismus! I hope you continue to feel better each day. It’s great to hear about delivery from someone who has had vaginismus as it is definitely something I still worry about.

I am 3 weeks post-procedure today with tip-only penetration so far and we’re planning to wait at least a year before trying to conceive, so hopefully I will be totally cured by then! I know everybody has a different labor experience based on innumerable factors, but it is my personal dream to have an at-home water birth with no drugs. Given my low tolerance for pain and history with vaginismus I don’t think this will ever happen, but it is still nice to think about all the options. I appreciate hearing your perspective about the epidural – I think this could be especially beneficial mentally for previous vaginismus-sufferers since we typically have a history of fear of vaginal pain. Great pain-relief for all women, I’m sure, but maybe even more huge in clearing our giant roadblocks! On the other hand, I have heard that an epidural may make women more susceptible to tearing because they tend to push too hard and too fast when they can’t feel what’s going on. I’d love to hear the experiences of other ladies on the forum!

[GoldDahlia]

Also, I am so glad you were assertive with those nurses! Who cares if they look at you like you’re nuts?! You’ll never see them again and they should hear about vaginismus so that they hopefully learn to give better care to other patients.

[Allie]

Thanks for the advice Sofi! I’m sure I’ll be emailing you soon!:)

[Sofi]

Hi Dahlia, interesting point! I hadn’t thought of that con for the epidural, but you’re probably right. My pushing stage was about 1 hour (which they tell me is short, relatively speaking lol). During the pushing stage they turned down my epidural enough so that I could feel pressure but not pain. It was difficult to push without feeling it though, I had to just do the pushing motions and trust that they were working. It was exhausting and they kept telling me I wasn’t pushing hard enough. Maybe it would have been better if I had told them that I’d rather push slower to avoid tearing than push faster to get it over with…. then again, at one point I remember the baby started coming out on his own even when I wasn’t pushing, so maybe it was just the way it had to be…

I guess the best thing is to be as educated as possible ahead of time so you can make quick decisions in the moment! That being said, I’d definitely recommend doing lamaze classes, or whatever childbirth style classes your hospital offers. I found that most of my doctor appointments throughout the pregnancy consisted of being weighed, having my blood pressure checked, and being sent home. Yes I could ask questions, but the doctors weren’t really there to have lengthy discussions for me. Looking things up online is helpful, but I found it more reassuring to take the classes. It gave me a much better idea of what to expect from the whole experience.

I love the idea of the water birth too, but I was too nervous to not be in the hospital. I’ve heard some hospitals allow you to bring your own tub to do a water birth there- maybe you could try to have the best of both worlds- start with a water birth set up but have the reassurance of close by drugs in case you change your mind. Good luck, I’m sure you will do great just keep at it!

[Heather34]

Hi Sofi. Huge Congrats to you on the birth of your little one!

[Sofi]

Thanks!

*Update*

Had my 6 week post pregnancy exam, which included the doctor using the speculum as well as her finger to check on the healing of my cervix and uterus. I was anxious because I didn’t know what to expect, and so I think my body just regressed into expecting what it was used to – pain.

I was doing my breathing and nervous the whole time, and then finally I realized, nothing was hurting at ALL! I mean, like I barely felt it. Is that how women who don’t have vaginismus feel? If so they don’t know how lucky they are.

I can’t say that giving birth cures vaginismus, and of course I wouldn’t have gotten pregnant if it weren’t for Dr. Pacik’s treatment …but my muscles were definitely looser and it was great not to feel pain. I just have to get it in my head now so that I don’t freak out anymore.

Haven’t tried for intercourse yet – too tired with all the baby stuff – but I’ll update on that as well! I am hoping that I won’t have to continue with the dilators, but if nothing else, maybe they will at least be easier…

[Nakitalab]

That is great news about your exam, Sofi! Isn’t it an amazing feeling to realize hey wait…it doesn’t hurt! So happy for you.