This is a good question! My first call was a blur, honestly – dialing that number was an extremely scary step and I was filled with blind panic as the phone was ringing. I think this step is the hardest for a lot of women with vaginismus for several reasons: for one thing, you’re finally owning that you have a problem you desperately want to solve (something I was in denial about for quite awhile) and because you know that by making the call you are setting yourself up for a lot of emotional work ahead. This makes it hard for so many women to take this first step.
BUT – the thing I most remember about this call is that for the first time in my life I felt understood by a medical professional about my vaginismus, and it happened so instantly. I’d had failed pap smears with nurses and doctors and tried to explain the problem to many people who were confused or unsympathetic, and it had only added to my shame. But the people at Maze got me, knew what I was up against, and how to make me feel like there was a team waiting for me.
Anyone at all who’s thinking about it should make this call – believe me when I say that knowing there are doctors out there who understand you and don’t find you weak for suffering from vaginismus gives you so much strength in beating it.